SECOND BASE

I made it there last night!

: )

TALES FROM ANOTHER CITY

Had an interview in Seattle. The day was flawless... but long. I was up and about for 18.5 hours to get to Seattle and back in one day. After fasting for a week to get into my Paul Smith suit, I felt like a rock star.

Here's what went right:

• Complimented at the gate leaving SFO. "We don't need to see ID for good looking people. (wink)"
• "Terrific shirt!" from the stewardess/flight attendant/trolley dolly on my flight up to Seattle
• "Great shoes" from the fashionable lesbian at the restaurant where the majority of my interview took place.
• Picked up by a Lincoln Town Car in Seattle. Was pouring buckets when I landed but by the time I was in downtown Seattle, it had stopped raining and was quite sunny and beautiful.
• Got a free upgrade from the dowdy Cheryl at the Seattle gate, I think because I asked how her day was going and engaged her a bit.
• "Cute glasses!" from the stewardess/flight attendant/trolley dolly on the second leg of my flight back to San Francisco. (I had a layover in Portland.) Yes, I wore my glasses in a shameless attempt to appear smarter. Me thinks it worked.

Not putting my foot in my mouth at any time during the interview process - priceless.

I took a really great pic of the Space Needle with my camera phone but I can't get it off as it says "Attachment too big." I ask you, how can a camera-phone let you take a photo that's too big to do anything with??! I hate my RAZR.

TALES FROM THE CITY

No, I haven't made a triumphant return to blogging; this is just the easiest way to send an update with photos. Here's my humble abode in San Francisco:

From the Entrance (Bathroom is just on the left there - not shown).


I'm standing in front of the closet.


The World's Smallest Kitchenette™


This is the view of the Bedroom - while standing in my gracious drawing room.


The view from my window. I'm facing east (towards Oakland), looking down Market Street. That's the Bay off in the distance and the Bay Bridge, which isn't visible, is further still.


It's quite posh really, considering the size. These photos were taken this past Saturday or Sunday on a particularly gorgeous day. Apparently, it's par for the course up here so I have no choice but to get used to it.

WHAT HAPPENED TO ME

I had conjunctivitis in not one, but TWO eyes last week. This is what I looked like:



[screen grabs of Sigourney Weaver as Ripley from Alien3]

pretty, huh?

STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND WATCH THIS

A fey He-Man sings "What's Going On" by 4 Non Blondes. Almost as laugh-out loud funny as the FenslerFilms G.I. Joe short films. Wait till the part where He-Man (as princely alter ego Adam) says "Oh My God" and tell me you did not pee in your pants. Genius. Whoomp

WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT, STAREY?

the lamest internet game... a stare-off! StareGame.com

WHERE YOU ISN'T™

Anyone else annoyed by the Eve and Fat Joe Boost Mobile commercials that are airing incessantly? The commercials themselves are fine, it's the voice-over narration that bothers me. Not only is poor grammar being used ("He chirped him to invite him..."), the guy has a very odd speech impediment. It's not an accent per se but he has the strangest pronunciation of words, like he's struggling to say them properly but can't.

I know it's all in an effort to sound "street" and give Boost mobile cred but because i'm not "cool like dat" i don't "get it". it took multiple viewings before i even figured out that the line "He chirped him..." was in reference to the sound the Motorola walkie-talkie phones make. For like the first 10 times, i though he was saying "shirp" and i didn't understand that either. In my opinion, advertising shouldn't alienate. But i guess it worked because, look at me, I'm talking about it.

Man, Fat Joe really is fat.


11.26.05 UPDATE
I just had to mention this: These commercials are running again... with a different voice-over! I'd like to think I had some small hand in that change but I know that's impossible. My work here is done.

SUCKERS!

Just like Sex and the City, the entire Buffy series is coming out in one, complete box set later this year. Boo-hoo if you bought each season individually. Hooray if you waited like me! Buffy the Vampire Slayer - The Chosen Collection (40 Disc DVD Set) (Seasons 1-7)

CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE?

If i don't receive at least one of these this month, [*cough*] I will never forgive any of you. Believe me, there's only 20 or so regular readers. I have absolutely no qualms about holding multitudes of grudges. Don't think I will? Just try me. The Realms of SUCKADELIC

And if you have to ask 'What's so special about this month in particular?' then you are dead to me.

MORE TEE-SHIRT STUFF

VictimOnline

"BROKEBACK" LION

Brokeback Mountain took home the prestigious Golden Lion at the Venice Film Festival, making this film that much more a contender for greatness. I feared that although this film has been hyped heavily in the gay media and by some of my peers, that it was bound to disappoint. Even worse, I feared that we (meaning, the Gays) should immediately take a shine to the film just because of the subject matter. Hollywood has that mentality sometimes; witness In and Out as case in point. This film could be a real turning point for gay cinema and for gay cinema to truly cross-over into the mainstream without being homogenized or sanitized to be more palatable to fearful, straight audiences. Read the full story here.

THIS TOTALLY RULES!

Mule Design Feed Store

STUPID CENSORSHIP: MORE D!©K STUFF

This is an appalling and stupid example of censorship gotten out of hand. For no apparent reason, Apple has deemed the title of the tame, PG-rated, 1990 filmed version of Dick Tracy as explicit (as demonstrated on Madonna's just-issued digital album "I'm Breathless" at the iTunes Music Store). Um, why Mr. Jobs??

Is this simply an error or did something happen that made the name of the title character unmentionable? Dick Tracy has been a comic staple since the thirties or forties, so why now? Yes, we all know "Dick" has long been a snarky reference for a penis but before our culture began to sexualize every mundane reference, it was a legit nickname for Richard. So what gives? Who made this call? And does Madge know what you've done? I'd bet she'd be p!$$ed if she saw this.

Come on, Apple there's no need to be prudish in this case. Change it back. Our eyes won't explode.

UPDATE:
FUCK! Those trickey bastards at Apple fixed it before I got a chance to post my rant!! (see for youself: by clicking here) Drat! At least i'll always have documented proof of it.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... MISS LAHNA TURNER!

introducing the comedy song stylings of Lahna Turner. she sings! she tells jokes! she sings and tells jokes at the same time!

navigate through the [hideous] black and pink site to the Music section where you'll find a "click to buy Lahna's CD..." in the lower right-hand corner. clicking that brings up a page that has sound clips from her albums. best bet is to listen to the sound samples from D!©k Jokes & Other Assorted Love Songs. my favorite is the "Stereotype Song". LahnaTurner.com

I'M BACK

I can't say anything of substance in regards to recent events that can have any impact. You know the right thing to do and where to do it. You don't need me to give you any mandates or directives. So don't ignore what's right in front of you. And don't think that because I'm getting back to the piffle that makes up SWA posts that I'm sweeping these events under the rug.

I just visited New Orleans this past January for the first time. I met kind, caring and fun people who welcomed me into their homes as if they'd known me all their lives. I'm saddened to think that their lives will never be the same. I'm glad I got to see the Big Easy intact and the way it was meant to be seen.

I'm settled in my new place and living among boxes and clutter. Although my life feels like it's in chaos, it isn't. So whatever issues I'm having -all of life's modern inconveniences and annoyances- it's nothing to the true problems faced by those I know and those I don't.

CHECK OUT A BOOK AND THEN SOME

In Sweden, your library card can get you a lot more than periodicals. Click the link to find out more: Advocate.com

OLD NEWS: PARTY MONSTER

Nobody did low-brow comedy like this guy. I even paid to see "Beverly Hills Ninja", if you can believe it. Yeah, I know, nobody can say I wasn't devoted. Chris Farley Gets Posthumous Star on Walk of Fame.

OLD NEWS: R.I.P 6FT U.

I always wondered were the fictional Fisher and Sons resided in Los Angeles. Now I know. Housestalking

HIATUS

SoWrongAgo will be taking a little holiday whilst i'm on an on-site assignment and prepping to move. posts will be few and far between, if any. but in the immortal words of our governor: i'll be back.

be well, my little chicakadees.

p.s. check out this week's featured track in the inline player at the top of the green sidebar!

FOR TRULY GENIUS-LEVEL FUNNY SHIT, READ THIS

from the absolute funniest person i know: Can someone give me a handle?. if, by the time you've finished reading the post and seen the second image, you are not sobbing uncontrollably with laughter, you have no soul. you wouldn't know funny if it came up to you, poked your love-handles and then ran away with a fractured phalange.